Have an
ice-cream
Judging by the out-of-control bookings for the assorted camp grounds at the
upcoming Oz GP, a hell of a lot of folk are making the pilgrimage to Phillip
Island for one of the Southern Hemisphere's great motorcycle social events.
Which seemed like as good an excuse as any to pass on some thoughts on getting
the most out of Da Big Trip. Up until I had the dubious fortune of travelling
with Grant, the Guido touring method resembled a bus timetable...gotta be at
Lower Freckle Heights by nine on Tuesday, must be at Upper Flogdock by Wednesday
– you get the picture. Fast, but no fun. Why not catch a bleedin' bus?
Grant is famous for rooting about, in the figurative sense. None of that fuel-up-can't-stop-now-must-get-to-the-next-town
crap. See an attractive-looking pub? Stop for a quiet one, and let the mind
relax. Which isn't a recommendation for getting fried along the way – have
a light and chat with the locals. Or a coffee out on the jetty of whatever town
it is. Anything that breaks the white-line fever.
These days I avoid forward-booking accommodation unless it's absolutely essential.
If you're booked, you have to get there – which means you miss out on taking
that interesting-looking detour off the highway. Forget it, there's always somewhere
to sleep.
My favourite proof of the latter theory happened in Moree – a cotton growing
settlement in country NSW. It was absolutely bucketing down, and had been for
the last 600 kay. Ms M and I had already squelched our way into a few pubs and
motels looking for a bed, but there was a cotton gin fanciers conference on
and all the beds were booked. Then a scruffy-looking local saw the bikes and
suggested we might like to mosey along to the local bikie share house.
Don't remember his name, but spending the accommodation money on stocking his
fridge with beer seemed like a mutually advantageous arrangement.
That's shelter taken care of, but what about food? Having once interviewed a
chap who held a round-Australia motorcycle record, there's one bit of advice
that sticks in the mind. A full stomach makes you sleepy and wrecks your concentration.
Caffeine and sugar work a treat when it comes to maintaining alertness.
One of my favourites in this area is chocolate-coated coffee beans, which you
might find at Darrell Lea or a good Euro-style coffee and cake emporium. Former
staffer Sinkers introduced me to them, and they're effective.
The proviso is that whatever passes for a body in your case still needs decent
fuel. The classic Digger's breakfast – a scratch, a shit and a good look
around – doesn't quite fill the bill. Something light, including fruit/cereal
for breakfast and fish/salad for lunch is the go for long distances. Reward
yourself that night with the other two food groups – tender steak and claret.
We should have a quick squiz at liquids. With Spring upon us and Summer just
around the corner, it's easy to end up a little hysterical without even knowing
it. You're in suitably protective and stifling gear, work up a sweat on the
more interesting bits of the road, and are perhaps battling the dehydrating
effects of last night's claret, or today's ale.
Make space in your luggage for a dirty great bottle of water. One of those one-litre
Mountain of Happiness Real Spring Water jobbies will do. The servo at the first
fuel stop will flog you one for a few bucks. You can refill it along the way,
and toss it out at the end of the trip.
When you get the irrits with how far everything is from everywhere else, it's
invaluable to be able to pull up, have a smoke if you're that way inclined,
a scratch and a big swill of the H2O. Maybe even a half-hour snooze on the nearest
park bench.
After shelter, food and water, I reckon the most important thing to have is
a camera. One of those dinky throw-away items will do. My best advice is to
blaze away, and try to learn from the results. Film is cheap and good images
are priceless. If you've got access to the internet, search Kodak's head site
(http://www.kodak.com) for the advice page on 10 hints for taking a good pic.
It's terrific.
Carrying a favourite person? Looking at the back of a helmet for hours is not
a recipe for fun. Every country town has a park for the kids to play in (necessary
every hour-and-a-half) and the exercise will do you both good. If the pillion
is an adult, keep an eye open for lookouts and tourist traps. In any case, buy
yourself and the passenger an ice-cream. A comfort-food hit does wonders for
the rider-pillion relationship.
You may have noticed I've avoided the usual bike set-up/having good riding gear
advice. That's because I reckon feeling good is 90 per cent of the success formula.
On to the next journey...
Guy "Guido" Allen
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